“Only understanding and empathy have any hope of moving the conversation forward among opposing sides.”
– Catherine Ingram.
Problems in a Relationship
“Love and war are both conditions of our human brain.
Arguably, though, the brain is wired first and foremost for war, rather than for love.
The brain’s primary function is to ensure we survive … and it is very good at this… but the things we do to keep from getting killed often are exactly the things that keep us from getting into a relationship or staying in one.”
– Stan Tatkin, in Wired for Love.
Surrendering to Marriage
“Yet, my fantasy of marriage as a wellspring of contentment has completely disappeared, and so should yours. Thinking you get happiness ever after is a ticket to divorce. I’ll tell you the four things I now know about marriage, from my own transforming relationship and from conversations with other flummoxed spouses:
A. Marriage can be hell;
B. The grass is not greener on the other side;
C. Savour the highs, because one thing you can count on – the dips are just around the corner; and
D. Nobody is perfect, so you may as well love the one you’re with.
To get to this stage took a lot of work and a lot of tears. I cannot imagine going through this psyche-searing task again with someone new. Therefore, I surrender to this imperfect marriage, because I love it more than I hate it and I committed to this man with a promise that I need to, we all need to, do our best to fulfil.
– Iris Krasnow: Surrendering to Marriage.
Listening to Life 